So today I feel like writing. Too bad Greg is never going to read this, haha.

I miss my family so much this year it aches sometimes. Maybe its because I was gone all summer sleeping in a scary tent where scary racoons walk around right by my head, or maybe their just amazing people. Even more amazing than when I lived with them.

I think my family's increased amazingness can be pinned on one event in our lives. We were part of a disgusting church split last fall. The splitting has been the only disgusting part, though. Our new church has been such an amazing blessing on our family. I am just seeing my parent and little sister thriving in the new environment, where God's love really is central.

Right now I am attending two baby churches that are only a year old. My home church and the amazing Life Church that I attend when I am here at school. Its so fun to experience it twice, because the exact same things are happening in both places. Its all fresh and new things are happening so fast that it makes me excited. But I'm scared of these churches developing out of these baby stages because its been so good. But how do you keep it fresh? How do you keep it focused on God's kingdom instead of stupid, petty things that necessitated a new church in the first place?

Wednesday night was my only free night so I rented Dead Man Walking, thankfully I found a VCR because they only had it on video. I had forgotten how powerful it was. All of the characters really invoked a strong emotion, especially the parents of the victims. The movie was all about conflict, which in turn created conflict inside of myself. I mean, the man deserved to die, look what he did. And all he could do was deny it. He was so full of hate for the people he victimized. Sean Penn's character was the perfect picture of redmeption (yes, I know this is obvious because that is why you assigned us to watch it). His story is how I feel about my own. That no matter what I have done, or will do in my life. If I honesty own up to it, and feel remorse for the sins I've committed, I'm free. I loved Sister helen's use of John 8:32. The truth he owned up to truly did set him free--free from the fear of death and the hatred he felt directed toward him from so many people.

This movie made me sick to my stomach a lot of times, especially during the flashbacks to the crime being commmitted. The violence and the "adult content" in this movie was absolutely necessary though. It made the story true, and made the conflict I was feeling real.